[NSFW] The Adventures of Homie Thug Chapter 1

NSFW STORY, STRONG ADULT LANGUAGE

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“Aye yo let that cop right there pull out.” says H-Bomb, a fit and muscular black dude sitting passenger in a bright blue 2003 BMW M3.

The car is stopped at a four way stop sign intersection on a road on the outskirts of a city, somewhere.

“What? Where?” asks Homie Thug, the driver, as he looks around in confusion with red glazed eyes.

“Right there playa shit! How you not see him?” says H-Bomb, as he points to a brand new Dodge Charger Police car at the stop sign to their left.

“Yo calm your nipples.” says Homie Thug as he doeesn’t move the M3.

The cop car accepts the gesture and makes it’s turn, heading down the street in front of them, straight ahead.

“There he go.” says Homie Thug.

“Yeah.” says H-Bomb.

Homie Thug gets the M3 moving through the interaction, following the cop car in front.

“Is ya shit right?” asks Homie Thug.

“What happen?” asks H-Bomb as he looks up from his phone.

“Ya gun, you loaded?” asks Homie Thug.

“The fuck nigga stop worrying my shit is right.” says H-Bomb with a twisted face.

“Fuck you hoe.” says Homie Thug.

A side street approaches on the right.

“Aye yo this the turn right here.” says H-Bomb.

He’s able to pay attention to his phone and the road to feed directions to Homie Thug, but he’s got no time for Homie Thug’s bullshit ass questions.

“Left right?” asks Homie Thug.

“Yeah.” says H-Bomb.

They been over the route and H-Bomb would love to smack the shit out of Homie Thug right now, but he’s glad he doesn’t have to drive so he can text some bitches before this job.

The cop car in front makes the same turn, off onto the side street.

“Ha, he comin with us huh?” says Homie Thug, as he remarks on the cop cars odd turn.

“Yeah.” says H-Bomb.

“Homie Thug you a fuckin retard.” says H-Bomb to himself.

Homie Thug follows the cop car down the side street.

“Yo, why your cousin not down for this one man?” asks Homie Thug.

“I don’t know nigga who gives a fuck?” asks H-Bomb.

“I thought you said his girl was givin him shit.” asks Homie Thug.

“Who knows what that sweet vanilla delight be on about.” says H-Bomb.

“Ha yeah she right.” says Homie Thug.

“Yo next turn, make that right.” says H-Bomb.

Just as H-Bomb finishes his sentence, the cop car in front turns right as well onto the next street.

“So follow the cop?” asks Homie Thug, with some concern palpable in his voice.

“Yeah.” says H-Bomb.

The M3 and cop car continue down the same new street, with the cop car in front.

“And yeah I been hittin that.” says H-Bomb.

“What?! How you gonna do that to your fam?” asks Homie Thug, with surprise in his voice.

“The fuck am I supposed to do if the shit is a straight up lay up? Not hit it?” asks H-Bomb, as if Homie Thug’s question made no god damn sense.

“Um, yeah man.” says Homie Thug.

“Whatever, yo this next turn here man, leff.” says H-Bomb.

The cop car in front again makes the same turn.

“Yo what the fuck?” asks Homie Thug, who is clearly startled because this shit is starting to get trippy.

“What?” asks H-Bomb.

“You wanna change the route up? Lose this motha fucka?” asks Homie Thug.

H-Bomb looks at him strange then his expression changes to concern.

“I don’t know we came through this way for a reason, no cameras.” says H-Bomb.

“We ite it’s just a coincidence.” says Homie Thug, trying to remember to act hard.

“Yo next turn is right, wait to put ya signal on so we can see what’s good with this pig.” says H-Bomb.

Just as Homie Thug puts his signal on, the cop car in front does the same, almost last second, and goes right.

“YOOO what the fuck!?” yells Homie Thug.

“Calm your ass down nigga it still don’t mean shit.” says H-Bomb.

“He’s following us from the front!” yells Homie Thug.

“Yeah because that makes any fuckin sense right?” says H-Bomb.

“Yo I’ve never been followed from the front, how is he doing this?” asks Homie Thug.

“Yo my nigga you high as hell how the FUCK can a cop follow you from the front?” asks H-Bomb.

“I don’t know nigga all I know is what I’m seeing.” says Homie Thug.

“Yo, keep following the cop stupid ass.” says H-Bomb.

“What are you crazy?” asks Homie Thug.

“Yo you’re really that high. My nigga that’s fucking J from the block in that shit, you really don’t remember?” asks H-Bomb.

“Ah shit.” says Homie Thug, as he remembers the cop car they stole the other night to be the main getaway car in the job today.

“High. Ass. Nigga.” says H-Bomb.

“Now I remember.” says Homie Thug.

“You better wake up playa this shit is about to go down.” says H-Bomb.

“I really thought we were getting followed from the front.” says Homie Thug.

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